I am old and I don't deserve to own a bike
My five-year-old son, stood in front of me the other day with tiny little hands on his hips, squinting his eyes and putting on a assertive tone saying; “Mira has one and I need one as well”
Mira is the other five year old of the neighbourhood who my son claims he misses every minute and wants to go and visit her five times a day. He strongly rejects and gets really annoyed when we tease him saying that he is in love with the girl next door, but it is obvious that his little heart has some feelings, while a bicycle is needed to impress the little blonde that has stolen his heart.
The first reaction of a dad in these circumstances would be “We’ll see about it” and so was mine. My little man was far from satisfied with my answer and took another step forward from his position and repeated his demand, “I need a bicycle” emphasising the word “need”.
Having decided to buy him one, I still went on teasing him saying that we will see and if he was to be a good boy, I would talk to his mother and we will decide about the bike in due course.
He started to get angry but was refraining from putting forward any reaction to avoid a complete reaction and said “but you have a bicycle and you are old”
There you go. Referring to my state of the art mountain bike which I occasionally hop on a ride, my son told me that I was old and still had a bike which I didn’t deserve because of my age.
The thing I wanted to say was; “Look you little prat. I was once young. I was also running after little blondes, had more hair than Elvis Presley himself, my belly wasn’t this big; Ok I didn’t have a six pack at any time but it wasn’t a one big pack like this one which you loved bouncing on when you were little. I never had the nerve to stand in front my dad and tell him that I need a bike because my little girlfriend has one. He wouldn’t even listen. If you think I will buy you a bike so you can show it off to the girl next door and then chuck in the shed for it to rust like you did with the other one I bought you last year, you have another thing coming. Money doesn’t grow on the trees you know. Now go to your room and stay there until dinner. Who do you think you are to come and have a ‘Tyrion Lannister style’ go at me? No Ipad and no going to Mira’s house for a week, you little Dwarf!”
But I didn’t.
Instead I got up, got dressed and took him to a nearest bicycle shop and paid a shitload of money for a new shiny blue bike for my little man to show off to his girlfriend next door.
Bless him he thinks he is in love the poor sod.